ff

we are just catching the end of national eating disorder awareness week. visit the website to learn a lot of things. there are infographics, and you KNOW i love infographics. here's a particularly relevant infographic about women and eating disorders. just gonna leave you with that for today.

trampampoline

new favourite thing! for sports-food.

BOUNCE! almond protein ball. it basically is like eating delicious almond cookie dough. which is, of course, the very best thing. you should try it, everyone.

update

well it's just past two weeks into this food elimination thing, so i thought i'd give you a quick update. so far it isn't sooooo bad. i'm putting more time into cooking rather than just throwing some pasta on the stove. which is good. for my brain as well as my body. i forget how satisfying cooking something real can be.

i'm eating kale like a monster. oh man i cannot get enough of the stuff! kale in everything! kale forever!

generally, although it is early to say, i am feeling good in the stomachs. i find i feel like i'm hungrier, which i think has to do with feeling less disgustingly bloated-mc-pain-doubledover. so that is great!

the one thing that is killing me is dessert. dessert is haaaaarrrd to come up with, and i am missing the sugar-taste pretty much ALL THE TIME! all i can think about for probably about 82% of my waking hours is doughnuts.

{you can make these for yourself because you are not me. recipe here.}

ooooooof. when i am done this thing, and allowed to re-introduce, i will be on the doughnuts so fast. so i guess that means my first re-introductions will be gluten and sugar. i get 2 every 2 weeks, so hooooooray!

i'm sorry. for the next 6 weeks

 {this woman is on a cleanse. i will not be happy and in a field and cleansing like this woman.}

DISCLAIMER POINT TIMES A MILLION! THIS IS NOT A CLEANSE! THIS IS NOT A DIET! IF YOU CALL IT A CLEANSE OR A DIET I WILL LOSE MY MIND ALL UPONS YOU. YOU HAVE BEEN SO WARNED.

starting today i will not be eating a whole pile of things that i love eating. because a naturopath told me not to. because my body is all 'uuuuh, we don't know about these things. these things make us feel like bleeeeehhhhhhhh'. (my body is not very articulate.)

i am super excited about this and also very very not excited. for one thing, i will be one of 'those' people who can't eat a lot of stuff, and therefore can't eat at a lot of restaurants, friends' houses, so on. i will be difficult. and i hate that. also, i'm not so much with the super-strength will power. and i LOOOVVVEEE food and drink. and i hate to be so limited in what i can consume.

but. then again. i have been so doubled over so many times with mysterious mystery pain from eating and drinking. and if i can live life without having to leave parties and dinner tables to cry in the bathroom... well. it'll all be worth it. for sure. it'll be good to know that not being in pain is as simple as not eating such-and-such thing. i have to go full-tilt for six weeks. no cheats. and then i can re-introduce slowly, one or two items at a time. and see if it was a temporary negative reaction my body was having (over-consumption of the same things can apparently cause this) or a full-forever reaction. me and my body. trying to talk to each other.

but i'll say one more time, sans caplocks just to be nice. this isn't a diet and it isn't a cleanse. i'm not doing this to 'detox my system' or flush out water-weight or blah blah gross-dumb. i HATE cleanses and diets. this is not a vanity project. this is me trying to not poison myself anymore. this isn't some run of the mill list of thangs. this is a specific list. that my body chose. to eliminate. if i were allergic to bees, and decided to stop getting stung by bees for a while to see if i felt better, no one would say 'oh, you're doing one of those bee-free facial skin rejuvenation plans? my aunt did that!' because people would know that not getting stung by bees when you have a bad reaction to bee stings that is slowly killing you is a GOOD idea for your health. BLAH BLAH I HATE CLEANSES!

anyways! hoping you'll be super supportive of me, and accept my pre-apology for being difficult and probably pretty whiny. here's what i can't eat!!!

fruits: banana, cantaloupe, mango, strawberry, pineapple, watermelon, avacado,

veg: carrots, cabbage, corn, mushroom, eggplant, pepper (green & red),

dairy: cowmilk, cottage cheese, cheddar cheese, 'american' cheese (ha! what?!), whey (cowmilk),

grains etc: buckwheat, malt (barley), gluten, gliaden, oat, rye, yeast (brewers), wheat bran, wheat (whole), navy bean, dill, hops, peanut, poppyseed,

fish/meat: clam, crab, lobster, shrimp, ham,

fun things: milk chocolate, MSG, superheated veg fat (deep frying), sugar (white & brown), beer, coke, wine (red & white)

 {goodbye, sweetest friends}

weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee! here goes. i realize that i've already messed up, cause i forgot oats were on the list and had oatmeal for breakfast. damn it! ugh. this is gonna be a hard time!