today i am feeling hollowed out. so tired, still, despite all the sleep. despite all the caffeine. truly. all the caffeine. black tea, energy capsules, red bull, coffee beans. and still falling asleep where i stand. not a moment of clarity or alertness. and then, not so surprisingly, the spinning headache and swirling cold sweat all up my arms. i am fed up with this body today.
this quiet desperate dance, then. i had forgotten how wonderful it was.
when other helpers fail and comforts flee...
still, always, my favourite hymn.
i just want to be able to make it to ballet tonight. please.
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